An amazing friend of mine recently introduced me to Mark Schultz. He is a christian songwriter and singer who was adopted. He wrote a song for his birth mother that I really enjoyed. The following you tube videos are of him describing the story behind the song (remember, I love getting the story) and the actual song. I'll also post the lyrics so you can sing along!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z61zdZJ9uZc&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YhqJYOYcnAU&NR=1
Mark Schultz Lyrics - Everything To Me Lyrics
I must have felt your tears
When they took me from your arms
I’m sure I must have heard you say goodbye
Lonely and afraid had you made a big mistake
Could an ocean even hold the tears you cried
But you had dreams for me
You wanted the best for me
And you made the only choice you could that night
(Chorus)
You gave life to me
A brand new world to see
Like playing baseball in the yard with dad at night
Mom reading Goodnight Moon
And praying in my room
So if you worry if your choice was right
You gave me up but you gave everything to me
And if I saw you on the street
Would you know that it was me
And would your eyes be blue or green like mine
Would we share a warm embrace
Would you know me in your heart
Or would you smile and let me walk on by
Knowing you had dreams for me
You wanted the best for me
And I hope that you’d be proud of who I am
(Chorus)
You gave life to me
A chance to find my dreams
And a chance to fall in love
You should have seen her shining face
On our wedding day
Oh is this the dream you had in mind
When you gave me up
You gave everything to me
And when I see you there
Watching from heaven’s gates
Into your arms
I’m gonna run
And when you look in my eyes
You can see my whole life
See who I was
And who I’ve become
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
Monday, July 21, 2008
This Makes Me Smile
"Drawing is just two things, putting lines on paper, and deciding where they go."
James A. Owen
James A. Owen
Sunday, July 20, 2008
BFF
This one is simple, thanks to my good friend Chris, who spent the weekend with me being a friend and helping me find happiness again.
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
To My Friend
His name was Lance. He was truly my best friend up until he took his own life in 2003. I met Lance only a few years earlier, he knew me by reputation and showed up at my front door one day. I had been heavily involved in the local wakeboarding community; I helped out our local dealer, competed competitively, and taught a group of local riders - mostly kids that wanted to compete in local tournaments. He purchased a boat from the local dealer that I helped and was privy to my involvement. Coincidentally, his parents also happened to live in my neighborhood. I don’t know how long Lance knew me before I knew him, but one day when I had my boat in my driveway he stopped by and wanted to talk wakeboarding. I warmly welcomed him in. Lance was instantly the type of guy that you just had to like. His outgoing personality and sense of humor was wonderful. We instantly became wakeboarding buddies and friends. Lance was the first guy that I allowed really close to me. I have always been the type of guy that just “took care of it” on my own. I would use my toes to hold a screw before I allowed someone to help me. I tell you this because at some point Lance showed me how he could not only be my friend, but be the guy who could hold my screw when needed. Lance was a big part of my life. We hung out together, wakeboarded together and enjoyed each other’s company.
Lance was only a few years older than me with a wife, a 5 year old daughter and a 7 year old son. The fall and winter of 2002 his marriage became rocky. His wife was having an affair with a man at her work. This devastated Lance and he threatened suicide. He was admitted to a hospital where he convinced doctors he was not suicidal – he was good at knowing what to say. His wife filed a restraining order as she feared for her safety after his suicide attempt. He started living at his parent’s house just up the street from our house. Consequently he spent much of his time at our house; which we welcomed. He loved his wife and wanted nothing more than to be with her. She gave up on their marriage, but Lance would not. While he tired everything to mend their relationship she only wanted him to stay away. Lance consoled our family and due to our past we were able to help explain some of the decisions she made and pain he was experiencing. We spoke regularly on the phone when he was working or needed someone to help him through some of the hard times.
The day before Lance left, I briefly spoke to him on the phone. I was home sick, lying on the couch when he called. He was going through another “tough time” and wanted nothing more than to talk to me on the phone. I was sick and very short with him. He was able to quickly tell I was not in the mood and did not keep me on the phone very long. The next day I received a frantic phone call from his wife saying he had threatened suicide again and left their house after he had gathered a bunch of odd items like the garden hose.
Months went by. People randomly provided reports of seeing Lance at the grocery store. They would spot his truck in a parking lot or some other similar sighting. But none of the reports or police investigations turned up anything. The news finally came during deer season in the fall of 2003. I remember hugging and crying in the arms of Lance’s mother while we both were only able to mumble “it’s over.”
In typical “my buddy Lance” fashion, he duck taped the windows and doors of his truck and then did the same with a garden hose he placed in the exhaust. A hunter found his truck in some thick woods not far from a major road. He was missing for nearly 6 months.
At his funeral they asked his family and friends to stand up and tell a story about Lance’s life. I had chosen a story about one of our many wakeboarding outings, one that made me smile. In front of a church full of his family and friends I stood up and tried to speak. I managed to get four words out before I broke down in tears. “Lance was my friend” I said, before I lost complete control of my emotions. Take time to be there for your friends, you never know when it might be your last opportunity – this is one of many lessons I learned from Lance.
I miss you so much.
Lance was only a few years older than me with a wife, a 5 year old daughter and a 7 year old son. The fall and winter of 2002 his marriage became rocky. His wife was having an affair with a man at her work. This devastated Lance and he threatened suicide. He was admitted to a hospital where he convinced doctors he was not suicidal – he was good at knowing what to say. His wife filed a restraining order as she feared for her safety after his suicide attempt. He started living at his parent’s house just up the street from our house. Consequently he spent much of his time at our house; which we welcomed. He loved his wife and wanted nothing more than to be with her. She gave up on their marriage, but Lance would not. While he tired everything to mend their relationship she only wanted him to stay away. Lance consoled our family and due to our past we were able to help explain some of the decisions she made and pain he was experiencing. We spoke regularly on the phone when he was working or needed someone to help him through some of the hard times.
The day before Lance left, I briefly spoke to him on the phone. I was home sick, lying on the couch when he called. He was going through another “tough time” and wanted nothing more than to talk to me on the phone. I was sick and very short with him. He was able to quickly tell I was not in the mood and did not keep me on the phone very long. The next day I received a frantic phone call from his wife saying he had threatened suicide again and left their house after he had gathered a bunch of odd items like the garden hose.
Months went by. People randomly provided reports of seeing Lance at the grocery store. They would spot his truck in a parking lot or some other similar sighting. But none of the reports or police investigations turned up anything. The news finally came during deer season in the fall of 2003. I remember hugging and crying in the arms of Lance’s mother while we both were only able to mumble “it’s over.”
In typical “my buddy Lance” fashion, he duck taped the windows and doors of his truck and then did the same with a garden hose he placed in the exhaust. A hunter found his truck in some thick woods not far from a major road. He was missing for nearly 6 months.
At his funeral they asked his family and friends to stand up and tell a story about Lance’s life. I had chosen a story about one of our many wakeboarding outings, one that made me smile. In front of a church full of his family and friends I stood up and tried to speak. I managed to get four words out before I broke down in tears. “Lance was my friend” I said, before I lost complete control of my emotions. Take time to be there for your friends, you never know when it might be your last opportunity – this is one of many lessons I learned from Lance.
I miss you so much.
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